So, I dont know about you but since I have been in my 40's I have been changing inside so much.
Maybe it is because my thick skin is starting to thin. Let me explain. I grew up in a very large family. I was #7 of 8 kids. Lots of struggles off and on thru the years and my parents divorced by the time I was 14. I was very close to my mother and very protective of her. I guess maybe I felt I needed to be tough. Then my first heartbreak came and I was thrown for a loop. I think this is when my thick skin really developed. I thought I was pretty tough. I did learn how to not be affected by things that happened to me that were hurtful. But, the way I did that was to not get too close to too many people. There were few people whom I really trusted. Then I served a mission and I learned to be more spiritually in tune with the Holy Ghost and to learn to recognize good people and I began to trust those that I knew were spiritually in tune. That is when I met Mike and we married and I knew without a doubt that he was the one for me. However, life goes on and the fairytale ends and reality sets in. That is when my thick skin came back into play. When I talk of thick skin I am really referring to walls or being tough. Walls that I learned to put up in order to protect myself from the possibilty of being hurt. Well, since Michael left on his mission, the walls have started to come down. I'm not sure why, maybe it is because I put so much of myself in to him and his life that now I have had a chance to deal with me again. Maybe where I left off is where he is now. Whatever the reason, I am so thankful to feel the thick skin thinning. Not so protective anymore....more open to deal with change. More open to my sweet husband and more forgiving, more trusting, more grateful for all that I have been blessed with in my life, more understanding and accepting, more vulnerable...and because of it I feel stronger today! Okay, this might be a bit heavy for a Thursday morning but this is what I was feeling today so I thought I'd share...have a wonderful day!